I always get anxious with storms. As far back as I can remember, I have feared the black clouds rolling over the horizon. I know it has to do with that movie “Twister”. I get so worked up – so fixated – that I can’t think straight. It’s not until after when I can breathe normally. There is much beauty to be seen with sunsets after a storm. It’s knowing that the worst is over and you can truly appreciate the world that revolves around you.
I had a really crappy day. I had a weight on my chest right from when I work up. Usually I work up to an anxiety attack – something to set it off. Not today. It sucks waking up like that. It gives the day no hope. I guess it wouldn’t help that I have a growing fear of sleep. It’s more or less the fear of going to sleep because waking up means I have to deal with the day.
I’m feeling much better. These feelings come in waves and I am doing much better to handle it. I know I can do better but that will come with patience, practice and time. One day I will handle it much better, and I will live as though everyday was like a sunset after a storm.